I am learning to deal with less internet access

So for the five of you out there who read my blog posts, you may have noticed it has been awhile since I put something up. Which is mostly a bummer for me because I have about three or four ideas in my mind that I have really been wanting to share, but current circumstances haven't been favorable to blogging. Mostly because I have completely thrown myself into my roles here in Germany with Amazing Facts Europe which has been a great blessing and privilege indeed. I am learning so much and thoroughly enjoying my job. I feel greatly under qualified and at times like I am not able to help as much as I would like, but nevertheless, I am giving it my all in every way I can.

The other part of the reason is that when I have found some free time where I would normally blog if I were back in the States, I have been without internet access. Now, this is not a complain by any regards. More of an observation really. I mean, in the States, the internet is never more than a few blocks away at the nearest coffee joint. I have not found this to be the case here in Germany. Which for someone who at one point went through about three gigabytes of mobile data in less than a month all on their own, would be difficult.

Let me sound cliche here though.

It has been quite nice to be unplugged for some hours.

Between work, a more temperate internet access, and being six or eight hours away from my loved ones and interests in the States, I have been enjoying a newfound liberty in not being attached to my iPhone's Twitter Feed and what's current on Grantland. Sure, I miss not being able to stay up to date with the Yorker, Atlantic, and Vice and I am not always able to be up to date with the latest viral video or the articles on Relevant but I am surviving. My Instagram feed is not quite as active anymore, but I have not suffered a nervous break down.

My mother always told me I am excessive. And I confess I am so I am, to be honest, enjoying the more disciplined life Germany is teaching me. Whether I wanted it or not, I am learning to deal with less internet access and in turn, I am learning to use the internet, not be used by the internet.

So it's been awhile since I blogged, but I can't complain. Life has been very full of experiences. Wordpress will be here later, but the potential extra minutes at work or with friends, won't be which makes me satisfied with my choices.

Christ is our unity

This last Saturday was a special one at the Christian Advent Center. It was a Russian-German Sabbath with a huge influx of local Russian Adventists coming to conduct the service. I am not sure on the details of the set up yet, but they come once a month and the whole service is conducted in Russian-German as opposed to English-German. The added complexity comes with the existence of some fellows like me who speak neither Deutsch or Russian. So at one point during Sabbath school, there was a Russian host being translated to German and English by two others. In my nineteen years of age, this has not been a regular sighting.

Having rarely experienced such a diverse setting for church, I greatly enjoyed to be part of the multicultural worship service. I also had the added privilege for this to be my first time in the back helping run the live stream, which kept my mind pretty full and focused throughout the day. However, I did not let the precious experience of being in that room pass me by. I cannot stress enough how refreshing this past Sabbath was from the many one-language services I have been to. It is nice to see brothers and sisters make efforts to worship together despite culture and/or language barriers recognizing that there is one faith we share. Moreover, we recognize this commonality supersedes the fact that we have to communicate through translators and body language and on last Sabbath, chose to worship together, eat together, fellowship together, tire out together, and close together.

By day's end, nothing but joy remained as I broke Turkish bread, with Croatian, Russian, Ukrainian, American, German, Bulgarian, and Brazilian friends. Cultural barriers be gone, for Christ is our unity.

A moment of humility

Most of my life has played out in a way reverse of what most people communicate their Christian experience to be. God has not been continually moving me into a job or role I never had interest in taking. On the contrary, I have dreamed of being a pastor since I was four or five, conducting small church service programs for my family in our rural Mexican home. Preaching a little sermon or sharing about Jesus to strangers in the market place.

When I was in fourth grade, I was already considering life in pastoral work, whom I would marry, and the way I would run things if I was given the reins to a church. In fact, it was so much in my little elementary mind that I wrote a couple poems about it.

So for me, I have always wanted to be in ministry and get a paycheck for it.

God hasn't needed to persuade me or 'gently' pressure me into it.

However, God has allowed me to serve in positions over the last several years where I have suffered serious damage to my pride. My ministry experience has been about continually realizing that my desires, ambitions, talents, goals, vision, etc. is not enough to create successful kingdom work.

In moments of humility, I face my limitations, or weaknesses, or just plain old rude selfish character and I fall to my knees pleading for God's forgiveness and blessing. Over the course of these last two weeks here in Germany, I have had several moments of humility but one has particularly stood out. The reason why it stands out so much is because it is in an area of great pride for me, the area of communication.

For as long as I can remember, people have affirmed my gifts for communication. Whether it was a well-meaning hermana who came up to me after a sermon and told me something, or my beloved mother, or even the sermon critique at ARISE, I have been told that I have gifts in the area of communication. Though I seek to stay humble and small before my eyes, I know there's arrogance in me because of all this treatment. It's a continual fight to remember the words of my former outreach partner Stephanie Lester, "Now don't get a big head because of this..."

Which leads to a moment of humility I experienced my first Sabbath here in Germany. It came while doing outreach as part of the Youth in Mission schedule in downtown Mannheim. It had been a while since I felt these feelings of insecurity about communication. I was afraid of talking to people because I knew I couldn't communicate. Just like that, a simple geographical displacement, and whatever skills I might think I have in rhetoric and imagery vanished to the point that I wanted to hide behind Jeanine and Manuel the whole time.

I only ventured to talk to someone on my own because a couple of the outreach organizers pushed me on, said they would pray for me, and that they would keep an eye out for me. Otherwise, I doubt I would've spoken to anyone on my own.

As I was sitting in the tram, heading back to the afternoon meeting, my ego was hurting. I was sobered up and I realized that gifts and talent are not things which I should be boasting about because they're more fragile and limited than I realize. Move me to another country and none of it means anything.

Here in Germany, I am once again being challenged because experiences are demonstrating to me that I am not the big shot 'ministry guy' I think I am. Basically, these moments remind I am only a nineteen year old kid with a little dream and much to learn. But you know, having much to learn seems to make life more interesting. At least, I seem to enjoy myself a lot more when I stop pretending like I know everything and I'm ready for anything, but rather sit down, watch, and pray.

So Oliver and I are headed across the pond

Hey. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog here and there. I know the stuff is pretty lame and boring most of the time because, I mean really, what does a nineteen year old kid really have to say about the world and religion?

Haha. I appreciate your support as I share my story here on this little piece of the blogosphere. :) And I am excited to report a very exciting twist in the story.

Oliver and I are packing up and heading over to Europe. Germany to be exact, to be a part of AFCOE-Europe. I am not quite sure about all that I am going to be doing, but I know I will be financially provided for and that there is a certain sense of security heading that way.

I'm a bit nervous because I have never gone across the pond. Also, mum and dad won't be a phone call away to help me fix my problems so the adult life will be wholly learned.

There's much to be excited about and much to be nervous about. Some thousands of years ago, Israelites stayed up late and packed hurriedly to make a quick exodus from the land of their bondage to a promised land.

I don't pretend to think God is leading me to Germany as a promised land, but tonight as I finish packing and prepare for this voyage, it strikes me that as I leave the States there will be much cleansing as I am cut off from many 'Americanisms' and experience the very different, very secular, very foreign Germany.

Most of all though, Oliver and I are excited to do mentoring with AFOCE-Europe and engage in all the lessons that will yield. Oliver invites you to continue reading this blog as it will trace my adventures, my stories written as I live under grace over in the Vaterland. :)